Blog 94

Happy new year everybody!  Great news! Sandwich bar has been nominated for best entertainment radio show in the British Comedy Awards so if you feel like voting for me please do.  I’d like an award, I didn't use to like them but I do now, I haven't won one for years and anything would do.


Blog 94a

Somebody asked about an old column I wrote concerning railway station trollies.  I do remember it vaguely, I think it was prompted by me finding a luggage trolley from the Gare Du Nord in Paris at the top of my street.  I'd be happy to make it available but unfortunately though I do still have all my old columns on my computer they were written in such an ancient version of apple works that I can no longer open them.   I am convinced though that they contain tons of brilliant material that I could use again if only I was able to access these files.


Blog 94b

Good news!  Our code breakers have found a way to unlock all those old files with my ancient columns in them and there is definitely some good, if out of date material in there, so expect the second series of Sandwich Bar to contain a lot of jokes about Roy Hattersley and The Rover 800.


Blog 94c

Bad news!  The columns I had decoded were all from 1996 and I had mined them comprehensively for material when I did my TV show merrygoround so no good stuff there.  And I still haven't found that column about trollies but the search goes on.


Blog 93

Just to let you all know Radio 4 have moved the transmission of "Sandwich Bar" back a couple of weeks so it will now begin on Tuesday the 15 of November but excitingly a second series is already in the works for all you fans of non-existent sandwiches and imaginary rolls.

And yes thanks for reminding me, I didn't know my edition of "Stars and Cars" is going out this week.  It'll be interesting to see how much of the Landrover stuff they use, when I turned up at the rural location I saw the producers had ordered up an ambulance and paramedics to be standing by and it turned out they were very nearly needed!


BLOG 93a

I saw one of those old "Comedy Roots"  things about the Pythons on London Live last night.  The quality of the video tape used for the interviews makes it look like it was shot about a hundred years ago and most of the contributors labelled "comedian" you have never heard of but as somebody mentioned for some reason I am there.  I have no idea when I shot those interviews or for what purpose but what struck me is that I am being the most unbelievable ponce! Speaking in a slow affected manner, making bizarre hand gestures and slumped in my seat in a way that is frankly insulting to whoever was interviewing me.  I said to Linda  "If I saw that I would have thought 'what a terrible git that bloke is'."  And she replied.  "A lot of people did think that..."


Whoever asked what political party I support.  I do honestly think that its important that as a political comedian you do not give support to any one party as you have to be free to criticise everyone.  On the other hand I think with the election of Jeremy Corbyn there is an epochal moment to make a fundamental change in the way politics is done in this country and I get very impatient with any of my friend who don't get on board with that idea.  A lot seem to be looking for ways to dismiss him and what he represents, either swallowing that he was somehow responsible for brexit crap or the anti-semitism bollocks.


Blog 92

Hi Jay.  Yes do go ahead and upload "Cak" and "Fish People".  Maybe people could give a donation to Medical Aid To Palestine or St Mungos if they do, perhaps suggest that.

“Alexei Sayle’s Imaginary Sandwich Bar” will go out every Wednesday in November on radio 4 starting on the 1st.  I think it wiIl be in the 11 p.m.slot though Producer Joe said he was sure he could do an edit and it might transmit at 6.30 as well or maybe that will be later.  Still it was great making the show and I do feel that we created something really special there, its nice to hear from those who were in the audience that they felt the same.  Those Saturdays at BH felt like truly special nights.

And yes I am in Australia.    Finished recording on the 27th, then flew to Melbourne for the Writer’s Festival on the 29th of August.   Then on to Sydney for the Festival of Dangerous Ideas followed by Brisbane Writers Festival where I am now.  Though sadly neither Linda or Wilf are with me.

It was an astonishing experience to fill the Sydney Opera House on Sunday, though I was feeling slightly trippy because I’d got up at 4.30 a.m. to fly from Melbourne that morning and Quantas had temporarily lost my luggage so I couldn’t do all my magic stuff because the tricks were in the bag along with the re-creation of the battle of the River Plate for similar reasons.

Actually I was saying to my PR in the car from Sydney Airport that I couldn’t do my magic because the rabbit was in the lost luggage and about ten minutes later the driver asked in a nervous voice “It’s not alive is it your rabbit?” I replied that no the rabbit was not alive, the doves were but they were flying to Sydney under their own steam.

Oh and Linda said I was trending in Australia on Twitter the day after the Opera House event though quite a few people got worried because they thought I was dead and that's why I was trending.




Blog 91

Hello everybody here is a link for you to get tickets to the recordings of my radio show.

Do come along it'll be fun-ish.




Blog 91a

Hi Jay,

Alexei Sayle's Imaginary Sandwich Bar will go out on Radio 4 every Wednesday in November (beginning on the 1st)  I think the time slot is 11.00 or 11.30 in the evening.

I'm glad you enjoyed it and you were a great audience.  I was quite nervous because a lot of that stuff had never been performed anywhere live before (apart from to Linda and Wilf) so it was good to see that so much of it worked.  Hopefully we can keep in as much of the stuff I improvised as possible.


Blog 90

I used to think there was some force in the universe which meant that anybody who crossed me would suffer.  Years ago I travelled to Birmingham to do the BBC 1 lunchtime show “Pebble Mill At One” suffering from a very bad cold.  Just before we were about to go live the woman who was hosting it turned to me and said, “those are my scripts on that chair I know you think it would be funny to mess with them but don’t alright!”   Of course I had no intention of doing any such thing but I was feeling too ill to make a fuss.  On the way back all the trains were cancelled and I had to take a taxi at my own expense to London.  Over the years I have watched as that woman’s career has slowly declined from daytime TV, the last I heard of her she’d just had her show cancelled on Radio Devon.    The only place that seemed immune to the force in the universe that avenged me was a sandwich bar in Southwark London that had been converted to a cafe from a toilet.  For some reason I went there twice and both times they short changed me.  I confidently expected the place to burn down or be closed by the health people but it is still going strong to this day.  The only conclusion I can come to is that the people who own this ex-toilet cafe are in touch with more powerful darker forces that me.

During the last murderous Israeli assault on Gaza I fell out badly with a pro Israeli woman on the Jeremy Vine show on Radio 2  who threatened to sue me for libel.   Then a while ago I was listening to Woman’s Hour on Radio 4 and I thought to myself “who’s that horrible snide person hosting the show?”  It was her!  So then I thought maybe she was in league with same dark forces as the Southwark Toilet/Sandwich bar but she hasn’t been on for a while so maybe she isn’t.


Blog 90a

With regard to audio books apparently Bloomsbury spoke to Audible and others but they weren't interested in an audio book from me even with my lovely voice and everything so I don't know what to do really.